Who Can Find a Virtuous Woman?
Proverbs 31:10-31:
10An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. 11 The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. 12 She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.
13 She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands.
14 She is like the ships of the merchant; she brings her food from afar.
15 She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens.
16 She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard. 17 She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong.
18 She perceives that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at night. 19 She puts her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle.
20 She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy. 21 She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household are clothed in scarlet. 22 She makes bed coverings for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple. 23Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land. 24 She makes linen garments and sells them; she delivers sashes to the merchant. 25 Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come. 26 She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. 27 She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. 28Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: 29 “Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. 31Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates.
Mother’s Day is supposed to be a time of joy, celebration, and thanksgiving, yet for many, it is also a day of longing. I had deeply hoped my mom could be here for both Moth er’s Day and my graduation, but she was denied at the embassy. Though she cannot be phys ically present, I know that whatever I’ve accomplished, she has a great part in it. God, in His wisdom, allowed this, and I trust that His plans are always good.
Perhaps you share a similar experience, your mother may not be here because of dis tance, loss, or a broken relationship. Or maybe you are here today, but your children are far away, unable to celebrate with you. If this day carries a weight of longing, I pray that you will be encouraged in the Lord.
The Bible speaks of God’s tender, nurturing love, comparing His care to that of a moth er: “As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you...” (Isaiah 66:13). Today, as we look at Proverbs 31, we see a picture of wisdom in action, a model not just for mothers, but for all of us who seek to walk in God’s truth.
Several characteristics (literary features) of this poem should be noted to appreciate its impact on the teaching of wisdom.
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1. The entire poem is arranged alphabetically (successive letters of the He brew alphabet - a pattern known as acrostic).
2. The passage has similarities with heroic literature. The vocabulary and the expressions in general have the ring of an ode to a champion. For exam ple, what is translated in our versions today “woman of noble character” is literally translated from Hebrew as “woman of valor”.
Putting these observations together, one can conclude that Proverbs 31:10-31 is like a song (hymn) to Lady Wisdom written in the heroic mode.
Tremper Longman III, “There are several reasons why the writer would use the literary features to present his description of wisdom: (1) a personification of wisdom allows the writer to make all the lessons concrete and not abstract; (2) It provides a polemic against the literature of the ancient world that saw women as merely decorative – charm and beauty without substance; (3) and it depicts the greater heroism as moral and domestic rather than militaristic.”
I. M - Modeling Christ-like Life (Both in strength and wisdom)
“She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.” (Proverbs 31:26)
In this passage, a certain type of “woman” is being sought. Who can find her? Where is she to be found? What is this woman like?
A. Literally, she is a person of “strength” (Prov. 31:10). That word in Hebrew is mentioned 4x (verses 17 and 25), and it is one of the unifying theme of the hymn/song. Because of her contribution to the whole community and her household, everyone seeks out this kind of woman. More specifically, this woman is designated as “excellent,” “virtuous.” The root meaning of the word (Heb. - chayil) is “strong, or valiant.” The term regularly refers to the strength of an “army.” In the biblical context, this “character” of the wom an, as in the case of Ruth, involves being morally upright, a responsible citizen, com
mitted to the family, and faithfully devoted to the LORD. She’s got strength of character and convictions.
B. Wisdom is not merely knowledge, it is a way of life - it is covenantal, ethical skill in living under the reign of God. The noble woman in Proverbs 31 models wisdom through her words (She teaches with kindness – used the word “hesed,” which denotes steadfast love and covenantal loyalty – This woman does not merely possess knowledge, she em
bodies covenant wisdom, instructing others with the way of the Lord with grace and consistency), actions, and heart posture before God.
Illustration: Think about a mother teaching her child to walk.
Application:
♦ For mothers - Your children are watching, not just what you say, but how you live. Model a life that honors God and reflects Christ’s love, so they may walk in wisdom themselves. ♦ For all believers - Wisdom begins with the fear of the Lord (Prov. 9:10). Seek Christ daily.
He is the true embodiment of wisdom (1 Cor. 1:24).
John Calvin - “True wisdom consists in the knowledge of God and the fear of Him.”
II. O - Other-Centered Love
“She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.” (Proverbs 31:27)
The noble woman’s life is not self-focused, but other-focused. She serves her family diligently, demonstrating the same sacrificial love that Christ exemplified. She devotes herself to serving her family. Everything that she does, she does it for her family. She is home centered. This is supported by the number of times the word “household” is used in the text. That is the place of her labor. The virtuous woman “looks well to the ways of her house hold” (31:27).
The Hebrew phrase “looks well” conveys active oversight, vigilance, and stewardship. This woman is not idle nor self-focused. She reflects God’s call to covenantal responsibility, faithfully working for the good of others. Her sacrificial love mirrors Christ’s example of serv ant-hearted ministry (Mark 10:45), demonstrating that greatness in God’s kingdom is meas ured not by self-exaltation but by faithful service.
Illustration: Consider a mother who wakes up early to prepare her children’s lunches, drives them to school, works tirelessly, and still finds time to speak words of encouragement at the end of the day. Her love is not passive, it is active, intentional, and deeply sacrificial.
Application:
♦ For mothers - Your calling is sacred, whether you serve within your home or beyond it. Every unseen act of love is valuable in God’s eyes.
♦ For all believers - Love is not about convenience, but sacrifice. Serve others as Christ served (Philippians 2:3-4).
Matthew Henry – “A woman’s greatest honor is found not in public applause, but in her faithful service to her household and community.”
III. M - Maturity in the Fear of the Lord
“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.” (Proverbs 31:30)
True beauty is not external, but internal. This passage reminds us that the fear of the Lord is what brings lasting wisdom and honor.
The noble woman is respected not for her appearance. According to Scripture, her looks are not extravagant, yet she maintains neatness and appropriateness in dress, without dressing too high or low. She dresses “modestly, with decency and propriety…” (1 Tim. 2:9-
10).
This woman cultivates inner beauty, which is her true attraction. Her inner radiance draws people to her and to God. Are you beautiful, not just outwardly but also inwardly? Are you a comforting presence when others are disheartened?
A wise woman understands that true beauty originates from a holy heart, rooted in her relationship with the LORD. The real concern is not her external appearance but how she is viewed by God. Focusing solely on looks is fleeting and can lead to emptiness. True beauty emanates from within, illuminating the outside. We face two choices: fearing our outward appearance and striving for better looks or fearing God and allowing Him to transform us from within. Our primary concern should be to avoid displeasing God, rather than worrying about how we may please others.
Illustration: Think of a mother who remains steadfast through trials, who trusts in God de spite difficulties, who prays through every challenge, and who finds peace in Christ instead of worry. Her beauty radiates not from appearance, but from her steadfast faith in the Lord. Application:
♦ For mothers - Do not measure your worth by worldly standards, your true value is found in your faithfulness to God.
♦ For all believers - Live for eternity, not temporary recognition. Let the fear of the Lord guide your daily decisions.
Proverbs 31 closes with this powerful declaration, “Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.” (Prov. 31:28)
Christ-Centered Conclusion & Encouragement
Motherhood is a reflection of God’s nurturing love, and for those longing to experi ence that love, remember this: Christ is our ultimate comfort.
1. Rest in Grace (not Perfection) - Proverbs 31 is not a moralistic checklist to achieve, but a life anchored in Christ’s wisdom. No one is perfect, but in Christ, we are made com plete (Heb. 10:14).
2. Look to Christ - Our True Model Jesus is Wisdom Incarnate (1 Cor. 1:24). He embodies all that Proverbs 31 describes. In Him, we find not only the pattern but the power to live wisely.
Paul argues that God's wisdom is revealed in the cross, “Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God” (1 Cor. 1:24). Jesus Christ embodies divine wisdom, being the one “in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge” (Col. 2:3), the Head of the Church, and the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. Past, present, and future are secure in Him. The Wisdom who beckons us is Jesus Christ. Christians, united with Him, re
ceive transcendent, transcultural, and transformational wisdom. God’s wisdom is visible when believers (dads, children, moms, boys, and girls) reflect the light and life of Jesus in our
homes and community. Christ is our virtue!
For every mother longing for her children, every child longing for their mother, and every believer seeking encouragement, be strengthened in the Lord. He is near, and His love sustains us. May we live lives that reflect His wisdom, serve in His love, and walk in His fear. Happy Mother’s Day, and may God bless each of you! Moms, you are beautiful. You are blessed. You are the best! To God
be the glory!